Unicorns, Onesies and Anxiety

Keeping my sanity and staying mentally healthy is a challenge every day. Staying present and not being overwhelmed by it all is hard some days.

Keeping busy, just to be busy is not the solution. 
Having a drink with girlfriends is not the solution.
Taking a 5 minute break is not a solution.

It’s taken 12 years to find what works for me, and as new challenges present with Abbeys Care, I need to adapt. That in itself adds pressure.

I’ve been down the deep hole of depression and anxiety. I still have the odd small anxiety attack, and challenge my mental state every day to stay on top.

What I know now that I didn’t in the beginning is:
– I have not failed my child and that my love and support for her is enough.
– I know my child better than anyone else. I can learn from and with her specialists.
– accepting help is a sign of courage, not weakness.
– caring for myself is paramount to the success of Abbeys care. And if I don’t know what I need, then to try everything I can to find it again.

Photo: trying out being silly in public for my small biz to laugh at myself more!


Taking it to the next step….

For several years I have been sharing the journey of being Abbeys’ carer on Facebook with the #365CareAbbey. In 2016/17,  I posted a photo-a-day for 365 days to share the ups and downs, the trials and tribulations, the fun and giggles from being her carer. It was a huge step for me to reach out and to publicise what I need to do everyday for her care. But also to put myself, Abbey and my family in the public eye. As the year progressed, I became more comfortable sharing the strange and wonderful, that is our family.

It started conversations with friends and families.

During 2017, it was a hard year, and I did not post a photo-a-day. Abbeys’ condition deteriorated, my boys needed me and I was myself coming to terms with a changing carer role. I found myself moving more from being her mum to being her carer, nurse and admin assistant.

Now that 2018 is here, I took up the challenge again to post a photo-a-day for 365 days to show how our journey is progressing, but also how it has substantially changed. I invite you to join me on this journey as I make my way back to being her mum.

In being more public about being Abbeys’ carer, I have found I enjoy advocating and sharing the world of being a carer to a person with a disability. Its a different angle for the world to consider. I hope I may provide solace to another carer, that they are not alone. That I may voice our concerns and trials. That I can show its an inspiring role to take on.

This is my first blog post for Voice of a Carer. I look forward to sharing with you my journey, Abbeys journey and my familys’ so that you may start conversations with your family about topics that may be a little uncomfortable. Topics that need to be addressed, but …. (insert excuse here).